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Senior Moment

      The

     Senior Moment

 Glenstone Baptist Church, January, 2019

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

As I write this, in just a few short days, we will be entering a new year. Although we may not like to admit it, this will be another period of change. As I thought about it, I thought about some of the changes I have experienced in my lifetime. I will attempt to list some of them here for the enlightenment of a younger generation.

I was born at home out in the country. Our town had no hospital and the doctor traveled to the various homes as desired. In some cases a “midwife” might be present and give assistance. In all likelihood she would have had no formal training. Diapers for babies were homemade and were washed by hand for re-use, not thrown away.

At our house, we only heated three of the nine rooms as a rule. These were the kitchen which was heated by a wood-burning stove, Grandmother’s room which also had a wood-burning stove, and the living room which was heated by a wood-burning fireplace. For lighting we used (coal oil) kerosene burning lamps which did not make much light.

Generally, this wood was cut from the forest and hauled to the house. At a later date we would have someone come with a power saw and some of our neighbors would come and trade labor in exchange for someone helping them in similar work at their place.

We never had electricity and as a result our supply of water was drawn from a well and carried into the house in a bucket. Imagine how much fun washdays were. Water also had to be carried for the chickens, and part of the time for the sheep which we boys had.

Another thing which we never had during my childhood was a telephone. Our nearest neighbor, of which I knew, that had one was probably four to five miles away, which made calling the doctor quite difficult.

Our food supply was quite ample, yet common. We raised many things in the garden and also picked whatever fruit was available on our farm or from some neighbor or friend who shared with us. We also raised chickens and hogs for our meat supply. We only bought the things which were necessary and we could not produce normally. We had milk and butter from the cows on the farm.

Many things we made for ourselves. In the depression era in which I lived, the supplier of chicken feed put it in printed cotton sacks. Many times I have heard mother tell dad what pattern she needed for making dresses or quilts.

Cars were not common in our area. In fact, if we heard a car, we would go to the door or window to see who it was. We finally had a Ford (Model T) and later a Ford (Model A). Most gasoline pumps were gravity fed. In other words the gasoline was pumped by hand from an underground tank into a glass tank with gallons marked on the side. It would then be drained by gravity into the tank on the car. Our roads were dirt with a certain amount of natural gravel. Periodically local government would employ men to grade them, but they were never great.

The most important change which ever occurred in my life happened on August 11, 1946 when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior. It would be a permanent change for me.

I lived on the farm until I was sixteen years of age, at which time I moved into town and lived with a cousin until I graduated from high school.

A new year will bring some more changes. No doubt, I will complain about some of them, but life has already presented many changes as you can tell from the above article. Yes, I have complained about many things in my life, but I would not want to live it over. Instead, I will face the changes which the new year presents and try to keep my complaining to a minimum.

GO TEAM FOR JANUARY

We will meet on Tuesday, January 15th at 11:00 a.m., and our speaker will be Lei Deng Cantrell. (In case you are wondering, she's not related to the Cantrell family in our church). As you may recall, she was scheduled to be our speaker in November of last year, but she was ill and we postponed her visit. Lei will tell her amazing testimony and story of how she became a follower of Jesus Christ after growing up in Beijing, China. She has written two books: One in a billion--God leads us all the way (c2007) and My Heart longs for the Lord--Draw near to God and He will draw near to you (c2018) .

We will have our usual potluck meal after her talk.

&&&&&&

Someone said, "Healthwise, we are still doing fairly well for old people. Our forgetfulness

is increasing but we can still add 2 and 2 and remember that the total is 6!"

&&&&&&

Can you identify with this?
A friend said her vacuum was "hungry" so she was getting ready to clean house.

 

&&&&&&

Q. What did the rug say to the floor? A. Don't move, I've got you covered.

Q. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? A. She ran away from the ball.

Q. What's gray, eats fish and lives in Washington, D.C.? A. The Presidential Seal.

Q. Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon? A. He took them to a pignic.

Q. Why did the doughnut shop close? A. The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!

 

The chef of an upscale restaurant collided with a waiter one day and spilled coffee all over their computer. The liquid poured into the processing unit, and resulted in some dramatic crackling and popping sounds.

After sopping up the mess, the employees gathered around the terminal as the computer was turned back on. "Please let it work," pleaded the guilt-ridden waiter.

A waitress replied, "Should be faster than ever. That was a double espresso."

&&&&&&

 

Stealing someone's coffee is called mugging.

Pasteurize: Too far to see.

Whoever invented "knock-knock" jokes should get a no-bell prize.

I put my grandma on speed dial. I call that Instagram.

The other day I held the door open for a clown. It was a nice jester.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.

Energizer bunny arrested: Charged with battery.

&&&&&&

After a crime was committed, a detective noted that he thought it was foul play. The other detective

said, "You mean, he was playing with birds?"

&&&&&&

Five Important Facts to Remember as We Grow Older

#1 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
#2 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
#3 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
#5 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.